Not Star Wars Of The Day: Ryan Gosling set to star in Blade Runner sequel
Today, two fandoms, both alike in infamy, will finally unite: Ryan Gosling is “in talks” to star in the sequel to Blade Runner. Denis Villeneuve is set to direct, Ridley Scott is on board as executive producer, and Harrison Ford will reprise his role as grumbly replicant hunter Rick Deckard. Gosling, notes Deadline, “adds a certain cool element to the effort.” I don’t really know what you mean, Deadline? Shooting begins summer 2016 for the sequel, which takes place “several decades after the conclusion of the 1982 original”; tragically, “story details, as well as Gosling’s character, are not being revealed.” Hampton Fancher (co-writer of the original) and Michael Green already wrote the screenplay, which will likely be changed 75 times, because screenplays are like tears in the rain.
Not Blade Runner Of The Day (Or Is It?): Steve Carell in Marwencol
Steve Carell is set to star in Robert Zemeckis’ Marwencol, a feature-film adaptation of Jeff Malmberg’s 2010 doc of the same name. The screenplay, written by Caroline Thompson of Edward Scissorhands fame, “follows Mark Hogencamp, whose memory was wiped away by a vicious assault. He finds comfort in building a miniature village populated by dolls whose identities are very real to him, as their actions help him cope with what happened to him.” I hate to say this (I love to say it) but this sounds kind of like Blade Runner. All roads lead to Blade Runner. You cannot escape its filthy, Coca-Cola-soaked clutches. Time to die. (Actually, please wait until the end of Newsies.)
Movie With A Lot Of People In It, Ironically, Of The Day: Army Of One
A bunch of dudes have joined Nicolas Cage in Army Of One, a biopic about Nicolas Cage’s army of one (himself) that he has set up to defend his multiple castles. Russell Brand, Denis O’Hare, Ken Marino, Paul Scheer, and Rainn Wilson are all set to star in the movie, which is “inspired by the true story of Gary Faulkner, a handyman from Colorado who receives a vision telling him to go to Pakistan to do what no one else can do—namely to capture Osama bin Laden.” So yeah, it still works as a biopic of Nicolas Cage.
Confirmation About Confirmation Of The Day: Rick Famuyiwa is set to direct Confirmation
Kerry Washington is the George Saunders of the TV world, which is to say, she is also allowed to kidnap my family and call it art and that would be fine because I love her so much. She’s set to star in the upcoming HBO movie Confirmation as Anita Hill; today brings news that Rick Famuyiwa, director of Sundance breakout Dope, is on board to direct. The film “details the explosive 1991 Clarence Thomas-Anita Hill Supreme Court nomination hearings, which brought the country to a standstill and forever changed the way we think about sexual harassment, victims rights, and modern-day race relations.” Thanks Deadline, now I can’t make a joke.
Ex-Scientologist Of The Day: Paul Haggis, in talks to helm The Last Of The Tribe
Paul Haggis is in talks to helm The Last Of The Tribe, a movie about how there are no Jewish people in the Amazon. Based on the book The Last Of The Tribe: The Epic Quest To Save A Lone Man In The Amazon, the film “tells the incredible true story of the quest to save an indigenous man’s life,” a man who “had to be protected against the money interests that were trying to kill him so that they could build a billion-dollar hydroelectric dam.” That summary confuses me a little bit (“money interests” as entities capable of murder?), but it’s okay. Haggis is most known for the Oscar-winning Crash, and lately, Going Clear, in which he tells Scientology to fuck right off.
Who Knows Of The Day: Will there be a Black Widow standalone movie? Why are you asking this at a press conference?
At the press day for Avengers: Age Of Ultron, Scarlett Johansson was asked whether a Black Widow standalone movie “remains on the table.” I know as much about the answer to that question now as I did before writing this news item. “I think that there’s room for a standalone movie,” she said. “The character has a really rich origin story and I’ve been really fortunate to kind of place all these layers on top of one another and kind of build up this character to this point where I think I can now start to peel them away and reveal different sides of her and really focus on—I think I’ve been able to grow with the character, the character’s been able to grow with me.” Johansson is actually saying zero things. This is some next-level shit, you guys, some seriously well-wrought movie-publicity nonsense. She did go on to repeat her earlier statement—“I’ve spoken to Kevin [Feige] about it. I mean, of course, of course we’ve had that conversation before, and I think Kevin would also like to see a standalone film. I think I can speak for him and say that”—but otherwise just kept saying a lot of words in order to deflect the question, which she obviously would never answer at a press day. I love you, Scarlett.